I'm tempted to Title this post "Dead girl walking". Not because I'm dead, but because I do often feel like the walking dead! If I met the me of 5 years ago, I would've given/ received a HUGE lecture. You see 5 years ago, when not working 1.2 jobs (a full-time job as a School Counselor and very part-time job as a Crisis Counselor), I was sitting ON MY BUM!
At the time, I was very wise and would often tell myself, within the next few years I'm gonna have kids, so I'd better rest NOW. And rest I DID! I stayed in bed late, only to get up to land on the couch and catch-up on internet tv... finish in time to join my night-shift husband for dinner... and then play on the internet all evening.
If I knew then what I knew now... it wasn't just a time to rest, I could've been SO PRODUCTIVE! With kids, productive is making the time to eat 3 meals myself... and that happens rarely. With kids, rest is squeezing out my own internet time at 6:30 am while cartoons entertain the toddler and the baby climbs across the keyboard (I typically have to write posts/emails 2-3 times before I can send it off without her "help").
I'm glad I vegged and rested, I might hate that version of me if I met me today, but I enjoyed it and relished it. However, I sigh when I think of all the awesome crafts I could've made. I sigh when I think of all the writing-for-hire I could've done. And I cry when I realize that I could've written my book.
Instead, I will continue to try to whittle an hour here, an hour there for myself... Damn I'm tired!