4.04.2011

Contentment

A week ago, I was on modified bed rest and a little terrified.  All I could think was how great I'd feel once I was on the OTHER side of this pregnancy.  I would NEVER have believed what the rest of the week held in store for me.  Seldom do things turn out as good as or BETTER than you hope.  However, that's exactly how my week went. 

This morning, I retrieved Hazel from her bed around 7, she crawled into bed with me, grabbing a few of her books and cuddling into mama's covers (who doesn't remember the wonderful warmth and security of their parents' bed?  I love that Hazel feels that way about my bed!).  As I read to her, with her head cradled in the nook of my arm, I fed my sweet Heidi Rose.  Two simultaneous cuddles!

Hazel is as charmed with her "baby" as we expected.  She is constantly maneuvering to get her lips pressed onto any part of "baby".  We have to be careful because often her maneuvering would crush "baby".  Also, we had to do some furniture rearranging as the pack-n-play bassinet we had in the living room is low enough that Hazel can "share" her toys (ie throw stuff in while Heidi is sleeping.  I panicked when I found a flashlight within inches of Heidi!).  Fortunately, we're borrowing a GORGEOUS wooden cradle from my friend, Jamie, and it's too high for Hazel to do anything but reach through the slots into.  It looks much better in the living room and the few times I've forced myself to put Heidi down, she sleeps happily and safely.

Heidi is so easy so far (I know... I know... knocking on wood/my head).  I'm kinda perplexed why I remember being so tired and overwhelmed when Hazel first arrived (ok, it's because I was not used to my life being completely scheduled around someone else and I had a lot of post-birth pain... which I have none of now!).  Heidi's still in the newborn phase of sleeping 23.5 hours a day.  She barely wakes up while she eats.  My milk came in on day 2 and my itty bitty baby is not able to relieve me one bit.  Even after she finishes a full feeding, I'm engorged and uncomfortable.  Oh well, my body will figure out her appetite soon enough.  In the meantime, I look very (ahem) perky!  At least with my overabundance problem, she is thriving.  She only lost 3 ounces her first 3 days, which is really really impressive!

All through this pregnancy, I felt like this baby was arriving too soon.  I felt like I needed more time to be the mother of one.  More time to get organized.  More time to enjoy the relative freedom that comes with each milestone Hazel reached.  I was truly worried about not bonding with #2 (p.s. to future Heidi, don't hold this over my head!).  Case in point:  Little Miss Just-shy-of-21-months just interrupted me with a request to use the potty... which she used successfully.

However, just like everyone told me, my heart grew the instant I first held Heidi.  I had forgotten about the newborn smell, the way they stay in their fetal position, the joy of holding a sleeping baby skin to skin, the funny faces they make...

Yes, I am perfectly content (joyous really) to be the mama to two!

3 comments:

  1. I'm happy for you to! You sound so content and happy:)

    ReplyDelete
  2. It is so true - your love just multiplies! ( I was fretting about this before Lauren's birth!)

    So happy for you, love the blog! :)

    ReplyDelete

Oh how I L.O.V.E. comments! Thanks for taking a walk on the (koskersidle)WILD side :)