bleeding hearts

Babies need patterns. They need a schedule. At 4 months, babies should sleep through the night. Crying is good for a babies lungs (ahem- dad). Let them cry through the night for 3 nights and then all your problems will be solved.

If you've had a baby, you have most likely heard these exact statements. In general, Hazel has turned into an easy baby. She just endured 5 days of company with very few crying jags. Then the floodgates erupted and she let us know that she'd like her calm life back. Cue 2 days of screaming and that brings me to this morning. I'm typing in an effort to not go to her while she screams through the first part of her nap.

There are different types of baby cries, though I can't always discern them. However, their are real tear cries, vocalizing cries when she's annoyed, and ANGRY cries. It's the angry ones that make my eardrums bleed and make me want to climb back into the womb.

Last night I put Hazel to bed in her crib (on her belly WITH blankets...ooo! Sorry western world, but when a baby prefers her stomach, there's nadda you can do about it and her fleece sleep sack just isn't enough for our chosen temperature.) promptly on schedule, at 9pm. Then I went over to the main house to tidy up and do a few dishes so that my busy parents wouldn't have to see the mess.

I returned to our apartment to find a happy Dadda with a baby on his lap. Hazel's cheeks were rosy and she had this calm, content, victorious look on her face. I kid you not, the girl KNEW she was pulling one over on her dad! As soon as Jake saw me staring, he sheepishly said "I thought she was napping until I brought her out when she fussed and I saw the clock." Juries out on whether that's the truth, but I certainly can't fault him for loving some cuddle time.

Part of me desperately wants to have Hazel sleep with us. There is nothing better than leaning my forehead against hers while I fall asleep, smelling her sweet breath throughout the night, or being greeted by a smile as soon as I open my eyes. However, I do keep her in my bed after her 6am feeding and on the mornings when we fall back asleep together, I wake up stiff from not moving.

So, I'm back to trying to give her life some predictability and I'll just stuff cotton into my bleeding eardrums.

(Author's note: crying has ended. Mama 1, Hazel 1000)


  1. not that you asked, but by definitition (mother) i will give my unsolicited take on this: it's much harder to get a baby to sleep through the night after she's been sleeping with you. my theory is that once my kids have successful sleep habits, i can then have those random nights of cuddling. but i never want my kids to rely on my presence to sleep-that means i can't have my own life. and it makes those cuddling nights better because they are special. every once in a while steve and i will get in bed and say, let's go get haven. and we do and she comes and sleeps with us for a while. and then we can put her back and know she'll go right to sleep all by herself. it's a great thing. anyway, that's my two cents, but it sounds like you've got this one figured out! you're a good mommy.

  2. I can picture the two of them looking oh so innocent!!

  3. Jessica(Jaynes) GowDecember 3, 2009 at 12:04 PM

    Too funny and on the opposite side of the spectrum. I BF and co-slept with Max. He is a fully funtional 4 year old and has slept in his own bed(except for a couple bad dream nights) for 2 years+. The time went quickly and I never regretted NOT listening to any of the family and friends that told me I was spoiling him...fruit spoils, not children ;)
    I carried him everywhere and went with my first instinct to go to him when he needed/wanted me. I mean lets face it...I don't enjoy sleeping alone either!
    I know you didn't ask, but alas like everyone else I always feel compelled to share my experience since it is different than most...


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