confession time

I feel the need to write a confession blog:

1. The bottom of my shower hasn't been cleaned for WEEKS... and I'm using my "I'm pregnant" card to refrain from doing it for the foreseeable future. It's gross.

2. I went to the cheap grocery store today, Jolly July 3rd, and was SHOCKED at how busy it was. I literally couldn't even look at the produce section because it was so crowded. Anyway, I just want to confess that I JUDGE people by the contents of their shopping cart. Specifically, I judge parents who have 3 little ones and their cart is overflowing with Lunchables, Chicken Nuggets, and other processed, prepared foods.

3. I also judge people standing outside smoking. I walk a nice 2-mile circuit through my neighborhood that passes by the State Mental Hospital. The perimeter of the property is always lined with employees smoking "off grounds". I JUDGE each and every one of them and walk a little bit taller. (that being said, I still love and respect my smoker friends)

4. There was an unknown substance on the floor this morning. I touched it with my toe and since I couldn't identify it, I promptly decided to pretend I didn't notice it. A few minutes ago, Jake shared a story about how there was a big cat turd in the hallway this morning (he picked it up, dropped it, washed his hands, and then realized that he needed to pick it up again in order to put it in the litter box). Julie-1, Jake-0.

4 1/2. Jake just read my posting ('cause I'm laughing so hard at myself). He admitted that one evening he heard the cat puking in our office. He decided to pretend that it happened after he went to bed. In the morning the cat had eaten it anyway, so he didn't tell me about it... until now. Julie-1, Jake-1.

5. I truly don't know how to write without the use of a gazillion parentheses and dashes. My parents sent me to a ritzy college and I still don't know how to use the English language. (Sorry - mom - and - dad!)

6. Today I promised my fetus to feed it more ice cream if it stays in the correct position. I just did it to ease my guilt about eating ice cream almost every day. My mothering skills should be questioned!

Ah, I feel much better :)

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