7.01.2008

Good intentions go wrong- Tales of a foiled kitchen


Well, since my Chicken of the Sea fiasco was everyone's favorite post- your day is about to get a little happier.
MAJOR CATASTROPHES IN THE KITCHEN!


This morning was the very first time that I woke up early in time to prepare raspberry muffins (from scratch- I want the credit), bacon, and eggs for Jake when he gets home at about 8am. That went smashingly. I guess my dinner was smashing in it's own way... I've yet to eat it.

Jake had 2 requests this morning: If I have the time, would I make chocolate chip cookies and leave 1/2 of the cookie dough raw? His female colleagues had a huge discussion last night about how much they love to eat raw cookie dough and he wanted to surprise them. His other request was to make chicken enchiladas for dinner and package up half of the food for a day shift colleague who came to work exhausted this morning after caring for her dying husband all night. I love a good deed and a chance to show off my new Suzie-homemaker-ness (or is it mess?)... so I was eager to meet his requests.

Here is where I need to set-up the situation so that the fault of the upcoming problems are not entirely my own... does having majorly dilated pupils (from my yearly eye appointment) make any of the following not my ditzy fault? Nah, I don't think so- but that's all I got.

The chocolate chip cookies: As I made them, I double checked EACH ingredient and the amounts. The ones that I cooked never really flattened out. They are these horrid little round balls of dry cookie. The dryness is probably a result of me leaving them in the oven for an extra long time waiting for them to goo-out and bake-up.

As I'm finishing the cookies, Jake wakes up and I say, "How nice to see you yin to my yang. I have toiled all day in the kitchen and day dreamed about spending a lovely dinner together discussing the impact of oil on our country." (his favorite topic that I have yet to actually listen to because it bores me) THE REALITY: "I thought you were hoping to sleep in today. It's only 4:30." "Shit", Jake replies, "I must have set my alarm wrong- I thought it was 5:30." Guess who was right? MAJOR SHIT- He had to leave in an hour and I hadn't even started the enchiladas.

Like a trooper, Jake pushes his grogginess aside and begins to help. "Why did you buy the HOT enchilada sauce?" OOPS! "This corn looks weird. JULIE- you bought Golden Hominy!" "Qu'est-ce que ca?", I replied in what my french impaired brain thinks to mean "What is that?". In a non-1950s sweet wife tone, I continued "well I THOUGHT that was normal corn. I looked at the cream corn and the sweet corn and that was the only other option! USE IT- it's more authentic anyway." "Yeah right." my loving husband countered back. We live in a Mexican neighborhood- that gives me rights to make-up stuff about their culture.

To make this long story a tad bit shorter- we made the damn things. Of course with 20 minutes to go- Jake started rice! Couldn't we leave that part out? OH THE FRUSTRATION!

Now he is off like Little Red Riding Hood with a care packaged dinner of semi-soggy rice, a CAN of refried beans, a baggie of cheese (for the beans), somewhat suspicious enchiladas, and very suspicious cookies- complete with a sheepish apology note. He also has a complete dinner for himself. This is the first time he's gone to work without eating. "OOPS" I say with all of the feminist empowered sweetness a 26-year-old wife living in the 21st century can muster.
Well, let's hope tomorrow's kitchen adventures are non-blog worthy :) I'm off to sample the delicacies that my husband is currently passing around while bragging (or joking...hmmm) about his wife.


(Picture is rather old. It's from my thank you cards after my Pampered Chef Bridal Shower.)

6 comments:

  1. All I have to say is--keep trying!

    And also--I'm thankful that I don't work with your husband. I hope they liked the food!

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  2. Haha! Julie I love it! I think its funny that you haven't mastered chocolate chip cookies yet! I recommend using the recipe on the Nestle Toll House chocolate chip bag. I turn the oven temp down a little and cook them a little longer this way they are chewy:) We can make some while I'm in town... they are my favorite! If it makes you feel better I never seem to get brownies right! I always take them out to early because I fear they will not be chewy. And quite frankly if they aren't chewy they are no good in my opinion! But they are often to chewy! Oh well, can't win them all!
    So it sounds like you have issues reading can labels:) Are you wearing your glasses/contacts? Haha!

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  3. I should also mention that I look forward to talking with Jake about the impact of oil on our country:) It's currently one of my favorite topics as well!

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  4. Jules,
    No worries. Every Christmas Charlie cooks breakfast AND dinner for my family. Year one I offered to help an was assigned toast. Not french toast, just toast. That task has since been taken away from me because I burnt half the toast and left the other half uncooked. Upon hearing the complaints, I told my family that they should b grateful because not everyone has toast on Christmas.
    XO,
    Liza

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  5. oh Julie, I love your blog already. I love your ability (and willingness!) to laugh at yourself. Life is too short, we really have to just laugh about it! HUGS!

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  6. ha ha ha . This is hilarious!

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Oh how I L.O.V.E. comments! Thanks for taking a walk on the (koskersidle)WILD side :)